Have you ever thought you knew how something was going to happen? Like you just saw it so vividly in your mind, your body would get the chills because just imagining it felt so right?...

I know my purpose in life is to bring light, love, and inspiration into people’s lives. I’ve made it my life’s mission to be the fire that helps people’s light burn brighter… to give them hope and the strength to fight for their dreams. I know that all I need is a strong platform and a way to reach a large audience and thankfully all my opportunities in entertainment have helped me reach so many… but I’ve been ready to take it to the next level… to really make an impact and explode my radius of inspiration to people all over the world…

I really thought I saw my path line up, but you know what they say… “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plan…”

Well, casting is now searching for their lead actress to play Mulan… and of course, she MUST BE FLUENT in Mandarin. I’m not going to lie, my heart hurt and I cried a little knowing that my opportunity to play my dream role would be stunted because my 3rd generation-Chinese American-self doesn’t know how to speak Chinese… but at the end of the day, I want to say how grateful I am that this movie is even being made and how adamant they are about giving Chinese people a chance to tell our story.

Sometimes I wonder who I really am and where I fit in… when I look in the mirror I see my jet-black straight hair, and my almond eyes… I know that I was raised with the Eastern philosophy that nothing means more than “family” and my grandma was literally a picture bride set up in an arranged marriage… yet I know I’m also the girl who’s Chinese family doesn’t speak Chinese, and I’ve grown up watching Western philosophy movies teaching me that I should follow my heart and that I can do and be anything I desire. It almost feels like sometimes I’m too Asian, and then other times I’m not Asian enough. I don’t know... I’m not typical. I don’t fit the box. I’m just ME… Moments like these push me to grow and become better and all I can do is be the best me I can be and trust that what’s right for me will come along.

Until then… I’m going to keep doing what I do… I’ll never stop fighting… I’ll never stop trying… I will continue to be the “light that lit a thousand candles” and be grateful for all that God/ The Universe has given me…

Everything happens for a reason and what’s meant to be, will be…

 

p.s. If you're looking for me, you'll find me in my books... Mandarin lessons here I come ;)

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